Fight another day

A conversation with oneself in response to The Daily post writing prompt, Fight.

“great! who are we fighting today?”

“We’re not fighting anybody, it’s just the prompt.”

“great, and i thought that for once something exciting is going to happen today.”

“Look, I know you’re cranky about going on a business trip on Monday, but you can’t resolve those anger through violence.”

“who says anything about violence? i was thinking somewhere along a nice banter.”

“Still, why do you have to go and fight people all the time? I thought we’ve passed this stage.”

“what stage? the stage where i’m always constantly angry? oh, sweet heart, we’re never getting past that stage. i just, somehow, am getting better at controlling it on the surface.”

“Whatever. Why are you angry, anyway? Is this about the Monday trip?”

“it’s about everything. the monday trip, the trip on april, and the other trip after that. not to mention work.”

“Ah, it’s always about work, isn’t it? Did you notice that in the past one month that you’re back at work, you’ve been constantly so hung up on work that it’s all you can think about. You’re sucking your own happiness because you’re so hung up on it.”

“oh shut up, don’t you think i don’t know that? i know that, and i am also well aware of it. i try not to get too hung up on it, but it’s just hard you know. you woke up for work. you battle traffic for work. you fake a smile and made small talk here and there for work. everything you do has been for work.”

“I know, and I’m sorry for that.”

“you know what it feels like everyday? it feels like going to a battlefield and you can’t fight anything, because the battle is within you and you’re fighting yourself. it’s a fight that i cannot win.”

“I know, and I wished it would have been different. Maybe it’ll get better in the future? Say, in 5 years from now?”

“it’ll be better than today, but there will always be another fight that i can’t fight. see the irony and the oxymoron there?”

“Stop being sad and depressing, will you? Monday is still two days from now.”

“i’m not being sad and or depressing, if you must know. i’m angry. i’m angry and i can’t let it all out, because i can’t fight this stupid fight i’m having with you.”

“Okay, let’s take a time out. Do you want to watch a movie? Interstellar is playing on HBO.”

“sure, whatever.”

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5 thoughts on “Fight another day

  1. Bojenn says:

    Oh, how I relate to your prompt! I use to be a flight attendant and I hated and dreaded leaving for 3 or 4 days. My children were young and I resented my job because I missed a lot of their growing….

    Like

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